Sunday, December 11, 2005

"Let's Move the Rocks!"

Now Showing!

From the city that brought you the Demolition Of the Alvarado Hotel, only for the Hotel to be cheesily resurrected as some ghost-like faux-authentic "Transportation Center", comes the newest in civic engineering ingenuity!

It’s “Let’s Move the Rocks”!

From the same city that continues to bring you such trailblazing civic engineers as Marty "let's just re-stripe the road in the middle of the night" Chavez comes the radically brilliant idea of moving a bunch of rocks with historically significant drawings on them 100 feet so that a road can be extended, making it possible for way too many people to drive ever-so-slightly more efficiently to their unimaginably boring, cookie-cutter houses!

You’ll laugh (in that embarrassed way that you as ‘Burque residents have done whenever ABQ has a “civic engineering” idea)!. You’ll cry (from the sheer combination of pure "Benny Hill-level" stupidity and unbelievably ill-conceived supposedly righteous surburbian anger)!

Remember: no one will be admitted during the "what the %&$# did we just do again?" scene.

"Let's Move the Rocks!", brought to you by Westside Sprawl Films in Association with MartySlum Productions.


And, Coming Soon!

"Dances with Rail Runner Train Station!" The exciting true-adventure story of brave commuters in the New West who risk life and limb catching light rail trains at stations with no Park-N-Ride, no station platforms, no nothing. See South Valley residents hop moving trains in their business suits and briefcases, after hiking 2 miles from the closest parking space. With Kevin Costner, as South Valley businessman Kent Brockman.

P.S.: Did you notice that the South Valley station is called "Rio Bravo/AIRPORT" station? That's a joke, right? I mean, they're kidding about the Airport part, right?

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