Saturday, December 31, 2005

Gravity: Not Just a Good Idea....

Albuquerque, I have some good news on the Darwin front. It seems we are not alone in proving our collective unevolved stupidity. I'm talking about the firing guns at midnight thing for New Year's Eve. A quick page or two of Googling shows the practice in Chicago, Fresno, Philadelphia, New Orleans, Los Angeles and, as Dave Barry points out (thanks to whichever ABQ Journal blog entry pointed out that Dave has a blog, yeah!) South Florida. And that's just in this gun crazy country.

Still, this sure sign that Intelligent Design may not be quite intelligent enough isn't made any easier by the sheer fact that there are incredibly stupid people elsewhere on Earth. Come to the South Valley of Albuquerque around 11:50 P.M. tonight and you'll leave (dead or alive) with the sure aural knowledge that the SV has more than its share of drunks with a poor grasp of physics and fully automatic weapons.

Some folks advise, as Dave Barry points out, that the Science-deprived direct the guns downward instead of up when firing. My personal suggestion is to speed up the Darwinian process. Point them at each other and at the shooters themselves. This takes care of the problem on many levels, and besides the revelers were probably out of Old Milwaukee anyway.

Celebrate well tonight, have fun, dance between the falling bullets. See you in 2006....only 301 days until Heather v. Patsy...I can hardly wait.

Breaking/Developing Time-Wasting Web Surf Update: I've been spending far too much time this early afternoon checking out NPOVs (Neutral Point-of-View Violations) at Wikipedia, and trying to find the most absurdly controversial 'pedia entry subject. So far my favorite is "Pooh's Hunny Hunt", a ride at a Disneyland, Tokyo. I have no idea why this is considered controversial, but I did get motion sickness reading the ride description. My 2nd choice so far is the entry for the "Association for Renaissance Martial Arts" which includes the hyper-sensitive mega-contentious phrase "Director John Clements has been called the 'most controversial person in the Western Martial Arts community'". Now that's saying something. I don't know what the hell it is, but it is saying something. Something evidently very important to bearded British guys considered too geeky for membership in the Society for Creative Anachronism.

Again, the site is Wikipedia's NPOV page...hours of free 'pedia infotainment (and possibly misinfotainment) there. Maybe we could invent a new form of Fictionary/Balderdash for New Year's Eve where instead of a big-ass word in the dictionary you could pick a Wikipedia NPOV entry and either guess just what the hell the organization/person/thing does, or what the organization/person/things terribly important controversy is. Just an idea for those NYE parties tonight before the drinks kick in and things are a bit slow.

Okay, off to Kurosawa's Seven Samurai at the Guild. My butt is hurting just thinking of 3 hours and 26 minutes of Guild seating time, but it's gonna hurt so cinematically good!

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